Seems to me like you might like to get a snake or another reptile. I can't think of any other creature that would do the things you're wanting it to do. Kind of an odd request to say the least. Good luck with that!

First thing that comes to mind is a Tasmanian devil. But then I'm thinking of the cartoon...not sure of their habits in reality, except that they have "bad tempers."

Yeah it sounds like a house cat to me... Although not sure about the "disorganized" part, our feline friends seem to have their stuff pretty well run.

Maybe this is a trick question and you're looking for a human? I know a bunch of people who match the description above.